I never ever thought I’d see the day


First, let me apologize for my absence. I’ve been so tired. We made it to twelve weeks!!!!! 12 weeks!!!

Many of you came over from my old blog. What I could not say then was that during all of this, my family was actually pretty horrible. My mother would constantly harass me. My unfortunate situation became the thing to gossip about. My mom would constantly pick fights with me. Arguments would start because ” you told your sister you had 9 embryos but you didn’t tell me.” Just your average crazy shit! Exactly what you shouldn’t have to deal with while dealing with the stresses of infertility and failed cycles. Last year, the entire summer when I was off work, we didn’t speak. I just couldn’t believe that my mom was stirring up all of this shit! I just finally said that they can either get it together or that they could get lost.

Now here I was pregnant and the thought of telling my family honestly sickened me. It marked the end of this stressful, yet peaceful period in our life and the start of the vultures pecking. Most people dream of telling their mothers they are pregnant. I dreaded it.

This past weekend we finally did it. In actuality everything was okay. I did get asked several times, who knows? To many, this is an innocent question. To me, from my experience, this is the beginning of what will eventually turn into an argument. I just lied and said no one… But in reality… Everyone knew except my family.

I’m a pretty open person. However when you hurt me, and it takes a lot, it is so difficult for you to ever come back from that.

We told everyone that they were coming over for cake for my birthday. The cake had a message on it “BABY B due December 2012”

It took a while for them to figure it out, but it was really cute once they did. My grandmother just sat there and cried for 10 minutes speechless! She finally choked out that her prayers were answered. It was really sweet and honestly the first time I think we cried tears of joy.

So all in all, we are very happy. Over the moon happy. I just can not believe this.

We also graduated from the RE on Tuesday. I cried at that appointment too. I never thought we would ever make it that far!

And brace yourself for what I’m about to say… Me, the most superstitious person in the world, bought a crib! It was on Craigslist. This woman had a pottery barn crib for sale with mattress for $200.00 and I had to have it! It was used 6 times at her beach house. $200!!! I think it’s becoming very real. I think we might actually end up with a baby. I really hope so. I just think back to the day we went in for the transfer. The snow, the insanity of everything, and it just feels like we are living in an alternate universe where maybe just maybe everything will be okay.

I introduce skelator!



8 responses »

  1. Twelve weeks! You made it to twelve weeks, friend! That’s awesome! I’m glad everything is going wonderfully. I didn’t tell my in-laws or my dad until 15 weeks. I was too terrified of my in-laws reaction to want to do it sooner than that. They of course didn’t disappoint. I’m glad your announcement went well though!

      • Gawd, relatives need to know when to STFU. My MIL made a big deal about the fact that we started the foster-adoption stuff and then got pregnant. I hate those comments. They make me throat-punchy too.

  2. Omgarsh! I am so happy to hear from you and that everything is going so good! I’ve been thinking about you and worrying about the possible reasons why you weren’t posting! Woo Hoo!!! 12 weeks!!! I’m glad you finally told your family, but I can totally understand why you didn’t want to. I just can’t even imagine getting that kind of reaction from your own mother. I am sorry. And I’m also sorry because I had to laugh at your dad’s comment. Really? Anyways, yay! I am so very happy for you! It is finally happening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. Yay! Congratulations. I’m so glad that things are going well and that you’re able to start enjoying this. And congratulations on the crib purchase–I like it. I’m sorry your family is crazy, it’s so unfair for them to put you in the middle of their drama when you have to deal with so much. But I’m glad to hear that everything went relatively smoothly. Congratulations again!

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